The Shadow Work of a Caterpillar : Episode 253

Hey, sister! Welcome back to a Taylored Adventure to Happiness. If you are new, welcome! If you are a regular, I love ya, I love ya, I love ya!

Does anyone else feel like time is flying by? I can hardly believe we’re only a few weeks away from the New Year! How does that feel to you? Is your throat tightening as you realize all the things you need to get done between now and then? Or are you filled with hope at the prospect of a new beginning? Whatever your feelings are towards the New Year, take a second right now to give yourself the gift of being present.

Become aware of your feelings about everything that’s happening and going to happen in the next few weeks. Now dial in on how you feel today at this very moment. With everything that’s going on in the world, it’s easy to forget about the beautiful gift of being fully present. Let whatever fears you’re holding about the future, and let those million tasks running around in your mind just roll off of you. Bring awareness to the fact that you are a whole and worthy human at this exact moment.

In any given moment, including this one, we are invited into a beautiful dance of transformation. Because the New Year comes with a reset of calendar days, I think we feel the pressure of goal-setting, leveling-up, and evolving more heavily, but really it’s an open invitation to us all year. So, I want to take this time to share a download I received about how pausing is crucial to transformation. I’m super excited about this message because I’m going to share an analogy with you that I think is incredibly powerful and applicable! 

If you’re ready for a non-hurried guide to goal setting, a method for identifying your next aligned action-step, or just a really good analogy, keep reading. 

A Caterpillar Analogy: The Answer Is Within You

If you’re in my Mastermind or an Abundant Life Experience member, you know I’m a sucker for analogies. The Universe often speaks to me through analogies, and I think they are a beautiful way of visualizing principles so that we can mirror them in our day-to-day lives. So, I start almost every single one of our group calls with one. Today, I’m bringing you a caterpillar analogy. 

A caterpillar is a fat, wormy thing that spends its days eating and crawling around, until one day, it just knows it’s time to go into its cocoon. As it’s in the cocoon, the caterpillar is diving deep into itself and discovering its truth — that it’s actually a butterfly. That’s when it remembers what to do next. Then, in divine timing, the caterpillar transforms into a butterfly. 

When this analogy came through for me, it brought tears to my eyes. I was meditating on what I wanted to share with you, and I was overwhelmed with how often we search for what we need to do next to transform. We’re searching, searching, searching. We make Pinterest boards, scroll Instagram, and buy courses. But, just like the caterpillar, we’ve known what to do all along. The truth deep within us — we just need to pause long enough to remember it. Deep down, we always know what to do.

As this year draws to a close and social media begins to blast you with “do this” and “don’t do that,” I want to encourage you, like I’m encouraging all the ladies in my programs, to be like the caterpillar. Go into your own cocoon and pause. Dig deep into your truth. Remember that the next step for you isn’t to consume more but for you to really tune in to who you are and where you’re going. 

Spend time asking yourself, “What type of support do I need next? How can I support myself? What do I need to support myself?” Then, sister, emerge from your cocoon and make an aligned decision that feels fucking good. 

Why You Need to Pause Before Moving Forward

Another beautiful example that this caterpillar analogy gives us is taking time for ourselves. Maybe you are an entrepreneur, a kickass stay-at-home mom, or climbing the ladder at a nine-to-five, corporate job — it doesn’t matter. What matters is whether or not you’re taking time for yourself. I call this the “pause.” It can be a daily quiet time or an intentional pause like going off social media for a week, taking a weekend for introspective journaling, or deepening your meditation from 30 minutes to two hours. 

I practiced this pause recently after my grandfather passed away. I cleared my calendar for a week. It turned into almost two weeks, but I started with seven days. During that time, I didn’t show my face on Instagram Stories. I didn’t talk on Instagram Stories. After the first week, I started reposting content from my clients, community, and people who inspire me. But for two weeks, I didn’t post anything in my feed or pour out any energy on my Instagram. 

Those of you who have been following me for a while know that Instagram is an essential platform for my business. But I knew my life — my soul — needed a break. So I gave myself the gift of “pause.” I crawled into my own cocoon and poured my energy into myself to heal and grieve. 

I trusted myself to know when I was ready to show up again. In the meantime, I committed to just doing me. Eventually, I shared about all the lessons I learned and the memories I was celebrating. My transition back to social media wasn’t seamless. After showing up for a few days, I took another few days off. It was so freeing, healing, and rejuvenating for me. 

If you’re frequently pouring into the lives of others or in a season of extreme growth — taking college classes, bringing a child into the world, or up-leveling your business — you need to take time to refill your cup. Whether you’ve been caught in hustle mode, a fear frenzy, or just feeling super drained, I want you to know that it is not irresponsible, naive, or weak to press pause. 

Pausing does not mean you’re ignoring what’s going on. It actually means you’re doing a greater service to the world. By taking a break from everything and diving deep into your truth, you’re filling yourself up so that you can pour back out. 

Instead of consuming more content this holiday season, try deleting your social media apps from time to time, reading a book, or going for a walk. Give yourself the gift of pouring more energy into yourself than a social media feed. 

How to Identify Pauses You Need to Take in Relationships

Holidays mean family gatherings and parties with friends (when there’s no COVID-19, that is) for a lot of us, right?! People are powerful influences on energy. They can be incredibly life-giving or extraordinarily draining. While the next few weeks are an opportunity to appreciate that we get to voice our opinion and respect others’ opinions, it doesn’t mean we should let people drain our energy. 

Taking time to clarify the people and conversations that are life-giving to you, as well as the relationships you may need to take a break from, is crucial to protecting your energy and continually stepping into the highest version of yourself. These pauses aren’t about avoiding people who have different beliefs than you. I’m surrounded by people who have different beliefs than me in many areas. I love them, and they love me. When I talk about draining people, I’m talking about the people who are determined to butt heads with anyone who disagrees with them and refuse to come from a place of compassion. 

There are two different kinds of pauses you may need to take in relationships:

#1: A Conversation Pause

What conversations cause you to be defensive, feel drained, or comprise the integrity of your highest self? Whenever these conversations come up, be prepared to pull back lovingly. Be prepared with phrases like, “I’m feeling drained, so I’m going to take a break.” You could even shift the conversation with something like, “I appreciate discussing differing opinions with you, but I don’t want to spend all our time talking about this.” Don’t ghost people. Be honest with them, and remember that sometimes setting boundaries means speaking up for yourself.

#2: An Interaction Pause 

What relationships cause you to be defensive or feel drained? Ask yourself, “What are these people projecting onto me that doesn’t feel good?” After answering this question, you might want to have an open conversation with that person, understand where they’re coming from, and explain how you prefer to be treated. In other circumstances, you may want to take a break from spending time and energy with them entirely. Either way, make sure your responses come from a place of love and compassion — not judgment. And, remember, if things get heated during a family gathering, you are allowed to leave. 

Creating pauses in relationships and setting boundaries is crucial to your Ascension. We can’t make the impact we want to make or create the abundant lives we want to live if we’re stuck like caterpillars crawling around making do with the way things are. If you’re going to elevate and transform, you have to stop, connect with your true self, and take steps to become the butterfly version of yourself. 

How to Overcome Your Fear of Pausing

Sister, because you’re reading this, I know you’re committed to transforming into the butterfly version of yourself. So, here is your reminder to not avoid the uncomfortable stories that come up in your transformation journey. Unraveling these stories is often crucial to unlocking our full potential. 

As you think about the areas in your life where you need to pause, notice what stories come up. Are you telling yourself that if you pause you’ll fall behind in building your business? Are you concerned that people will forget about you and your message while you take a break from social media? Are you afraid of looking like a bad mom when you take time for yourself? 

If so, I need you to know two things. One, you are not alone. Those are the same stories and fears I hear from the ladies I work with in The Abundant Life Experience and Ascend. Secondly, allowing those stories to become big and real is half the point of pausing (the other half is to heal). Otherwise, you keep avoiding them. If you don’t retreat into your cocoon and face the stories that are chasing you, you’ll be stuck as a caterpillar endlessly eating and crawling around — you’ll never realize your potential flap colorful wings and fly.

When you get into the cocoon and do the work of bringing up wounds and healing, you allow yourself to be transformed into a butterfly. Eventually, you’ll emerge from that cocoon as a bright, beautiful butterfly — one who is thriving, making an impact, and causing a ripple effect! 

Why You Need to Pause Even When It Feels Scary

Whenever it feels scary to take a pause, lean into it. Crawl into your cocoon. Listen to the stories that you’ve been running from or drowning out with busyness. Take a moment to acknowledge your imperfections as a piece of your uniqueness and stepping stones to becoming a healed and whole individual. Turn the world off for a moment and remember who you are. As you do so, you will transform. 

If you want extra support and to take this transformation journey with a beautiful tribe of like-minded women, join us in The Abundant Life Experience. This is my membership program where we dive deep into lessons all about tapping into higher frequencies to live a more aligned and abundant life. If this speaks to you, just head to abundancerewired.com and join us. I would LOVE to see your face in our group zoom calls!

Thank you for sharing your time with me once again. If this message struck a chord with you today, please pass it along to a friend. Send them the link or take a screenshot of this and share it on Instagram. Tag me, @iamtaylorsimpson, and let me know what pause you’re going to take!

I love you. I see you. And as always, don’t forget to choose happiness, because well, why the fuck not?!